


Bad at flirting, worse in bed

by CamilleDuDemon



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Bad Dirty Talk, Bad Flirting, Blowjob Fails, Clumsy virgin Kylo Ren, M/M, Unresolved Sexual Tension, virgin!Hux
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-06-03 14:43:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6614671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CamilleDuDemon/pseuds/CamilleDuDemon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Kylo Ren is an awkward virgin with no inhibitors and Hux tries his best to protect his biggest secret, even at the risk of sounding like a trunt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bad at flirting, worse in bed

Hux flinched, when he switched on the lights of his quarters and found Kylo Ren comfortably spread on his sofa, his long legs hanging down the armrest.

“Savage beast”, he thought with a grimace.

The general took a deep breath, trying his best to suppress the urge of beating the shit out of his insolent face.

“Ren”, he dryly spat, “what in the actual hell are you doing in my private quarters?”

Rhetorical question, though. He perfectly knew what Ren wanted from him.

He was desperately trying to find a way to get in his pants and he had made it clear more than once, shamelessly whispering indecencies to his ears whenever they had the chance to be alone.

Kylo Ren lazily stirred, looking just like a cat after a satisfying nap.

“And hello to you, General. I'm just...providing company in a otherwise lonely night”, he coyly said.

Hux gritted his teeth, a really bad headache starting to spread from the base of his temples, hammering painfully against his skull.

“I don't need your company, Ren. I need a cigarette and a twelve hours straight sleep.”

The knight smirked, like a dog who wasn't gonna drop the ball.

“I can give you a blowjob”, he offered, outspoken. “Undoubtedly, it would provide the right amount of relax to have a decent sleep.”

The general rolled his eyes, annoyed.

“Stop doing that, Ren. Seriously, you're making a fool of yourself, with your utterly bad attempts of flirting and...this indecent dirty talking. Besides, I'm 100% sure you have no idea how to give a proper blowjob.”

Kylo Ren bit his plush lower lip (Hux thought that his lips weren't that bad and found himself fantasizing about their softness, much to his regret) to prevent words like “You ass, I watched porno holovids all night long, just to learn how to do one” to escape from his mouth.

“I know how to give a proper blowjob”, he stated instead.

General Hux raised his brows.

“Is it a customary ability for a Knight of Ren?”

“No, it's not. But it happens that I can give blowjobs. I'm really skilled.”

Hux sensed he was lying.

In facts, there was something too pure in him to make him a good liar.

Underestimating how bad Ren wanted him, Hux challenged him.

“Prove it.”

A poor choice indeed.

Kylo Ren knelt at his feet wantonly, his sharp nose almost touching the general's crotch.

“Ren. What are you doing?”

The knight frowned.

“I'm doing what you asked. Giving you a blowjob.”

“Stop putting that word everywhere, Ren. You're filthy, you know that? And...I didn't mean it, by the way.”

“Too late. I can sense your desire, General.”

“Two things. Stop violating my mind and no, I don't desire you. Not at all.”

Ren shook his head.

With steady hands he grabbed Hux's belt and unfastened it, then proceeded to unzip his pants and making them slip to his slender ankles alongside the dull underwear he wore.

The general slightly blushed, when his (again, much to his regret) half-hard cock sprung free.

“The fact that I'm almost hard doesn't mean that I like you or your bad flirting”, he proudly stated.

Kylo Ren didn't even mind his words.

“I want to stick my nose in these”, he said, pointing his sleek finger to the curly mop of bright orange pubic hair at the base of Hux's cock.

The general gulped loudly.

“No! Stop! I don't...I don't consent!”

The knight's eyes widened.

“What?”

“I don't trust you. You're...gonna bite me.”

“This is a lame excuse, General. I can sense...there's something else. You're lying.”

General Hux quickly pulled his trousers up, kicking Ren with the polished tip of his boot.

“Not your business. Now leave and, for the gods' sake, have some decency! This is the Finalizer, not a second-rate brothel, Ren! You can't just invade my quarters and say you want to blow me! It's...utterly inappropriate! It's uncivilized!”

Surprisingly, Ren didn't reply.

He got on his feet and stormed away, muttering curses and unintelligible words under his breath.

Hux thought he caught something like “what's the point of learning how to give a blowjob, when Hux has a stick up his ass?” but he wasn't that sure, given the deafening sound of blood rushing in his hears.

When the door closed with a hiss after Kylo Ren, the general took a breath full of relief.

No one had to know he was still a virgin.

No one, especially that walking plague called Kylo Ren.

 

 


End file.
